Networth versus Selfworth

“What we must decide is perhaps how we are valuable rather than how valuable we are” The Vanishing Adolescent 1959, Edgar Z. Friedenberg Net worth is an external measure of how much we are worth in financial terms, while self-worth is an internal measure of how much one values oneself. In our society, there is a tendency to attach self worth and other people’s approval to material things and shows of ostentation.

The dangers of materialism A society that celebrates a person’s worth based on his or her assets, connections and influence is materialistic as it builds a social strata based on material things. When people are ‘encouraged’ to amass and cling to possessions, when our pursuit is on making profit, pursuing pleasure, and obtaining position, it leaves little energy, time, and ability to focus on our real purpose and the things that really matter.

A materialistic society rates individuals not on personal character and achievement, but rather on the fantastic display that they are able to put on in the form of and other extreme shows of ostentation.

In Nigeria, a societal value system has evolved where material fortune is more widely celebrated than diligence, honesty, honour and integrity; these virtues are seldom accorded the respect they do deserve.

As materialism becomes endemic and a society equates self worth with networth, with far too much emphasis placed on money, power, position and possessions, and acknowledges and celebrates wealth without questioning its source, there is a tendency for people to go to extremes in order to increase their networth at all costs and by any means possible leading to dishonesty and corruption.

As people compete to build the trappings of wealth and put these on display, the seeds of corruption are sown. Greed and the insatiable love for materialism are at the root of bribery and corruption, which have eaten deep into the marrow of our society. The endless desire of all strata of society, both rich and poor, for possessions, inevitably leads to moral decadence.

How do you measure yourself? Have you ever thought of how you measure yourself? Reflect on whether you have measured yourself through your job, your money, your position, or your possessions. Does your self worth come from your job and all its perks, your money, your position in government or in the private sector and the attendant trappings, or your position in society?

The Next Generation Children often identify their self worth with the approval of their peers, which could be linked to how many toys they have, or how expensive their clothes are. Or how quickly they acquire the latest blackberry, i-phone, I-pad or other gadget.

Stories abound of children asking to be dropped off before the school gate, so that their peers won’t see the car they arrived in. If it is not an expensive car or jeep, it could be embarrassing as they face jeers. In an excerpt from The Vanishing Adolescent, 1959, Edgar Z. Friedenberg writes, “What we must decide is perhaps how we are valuable rather than how valuable we are”. To release the next generation from the scourge of materialism, we must teach our children to be proud of whom they are, to value themselves and not to confuse their self worth with their net worth. Parents and leaders must teach their children and our youth, by example, that their true value lies in their inner qualities - their kindness, sensitivity, creativity, compassion, rather than their looks, performance, possessions and how much money their parents may or may not have. They must be taught to embrace hard work and diligence as a means to success and not be under peer pressure to look for shortcuts to “get rich quick”.

Why is self-worth important? Life is not about accumulating wealth and possessions because, in the end, you cannot take them away with you. We often feel a false sense of security by having a large net worth or more wealth than our neighbor. As we have seen in the recent past, net worth and fortunes can change dramatically; wealth can be transient and all can change in an instant. During periods of economic turmoil and stock market declines, investors have lost fortunes; properties worth billions will be worth only a tiny percentage of their “value” if there are no buyers. Wealth is nice to have and can and does bring pleasure, but it is important to keep it in perspective. A strong sense of self worth is the key to true and lasting fulfillment.

Primary success, of which self worth is a part and includes character, integrity, humility, service above self, and legacy are far more important than secondary success of networth that is associated with title, position, bank accounts, properties and cars.

In their study, “Inner Security and Infinite Wealth: Merging Self Worth and Net Worth”, Stuart Zimmerman and Jared Rosen contrast the idea of net worth, an external measure of how much money one may or may not have, and self-worth, an internal appraisal of one’s own worth. They suggest that in order to develop a sense of well being beyond material success and its outward trappings, we should strive to become more aware of what is truly important in life and what legacy we will leave behind.

 

Food for thought….